Family Friendly Flights
Yes it’s true: The movie King Kong poses a threat to your children. (I really didn’t want to post a picture of kids toting around guns, but there are plenty on Flickr.)
Lacking something better to do Rep. Heath Shuler of North Carolina is sponsoring a bill that would ban violent and sexually suggestive movies from U.S. airlines. Never mind that in-flight movies are already selected from the pile deemed LEAST offensive, but then they’re usually edited down further to the point of being unwatchable for most adults. That’s right, adults. I prefer to live in a society where the demarcation line of culture and behavioral norms doesn’t fall right above a kindergarten class. That doesn’t mean that every public space should be a red light district, but do you really want public spaces to be dumbed down to a Chuck E. Cheese level for ALL citizens?
Another busybody, Jesse Kalisher, of Chapel Hill, started the site www.kidsafefilms.com to encourage bored and/or outraged parents to become involved. In addition to a bitchy petition letter and horror stories of children almost joining gangs or becoming gay upon deplaning after viewing movies like King Kong, this poster actually writes something we can both agree on!
I no longer fly with my children because of the coarseness of in-flight entertainment.
— Marta McGrath
Right on Marta! Airlines are having enough problems simply taking off and landing at their destinations in a timely manner, if they make it there at all, without needing to worry if “50 First Dates” will traumatize children. Get congress and government out of such trivial concerns. Senators and congressmen: WHY do you let such stupid groups push you around? YOU know this isn’t an important issue! If enough parents believe this is truly a problem they will stop flying with “A” airline, and “B” airline will step in and fill their need. In fact this crazy free market concept already exists in the nascent of air travel: Southwest is known for goofiness and frivolity, JetBlue is known for upscale budget with personal video screens – hear that angry moms? There’s “Smintair” in Germany which caters to smokers, and we had Hooters Air for a while in the U.S. for those perpetually horny travelers. See? Where there’s a need, the market will provide.
Cranky Flier had further analysis and this to say:
A bunch of passengers suffer without in-flight entertainment just because a couple of parents can’t prevent their kid from watching the movie. Give ‘em a blindfold or some baby Ambien (or something else that doesn’t exist just in fantasy land). Or better yet, just don’t fly on planes with overhead screens. This doesn’t impact flights with personal screens because you can turn those off yourself, so there are plenty of options for parents who really care about this.
I’ve said it before: Regulations and laws should exist to protect people from the dangers of plummeting elevators, defective airbags, and tainted peanut butter. Government doesn’t need to be involved in the mundane, trivial, and compartmentalized aspects of consumerism. But if they do, how about controlling something more obnoxious: The blaring news channels above every other airport gate. I find noise pollution much more intrusive then quasi-adult movies with the sound off, and I lost my TV-B-Gone.
Jesse Kalisher, the above mentioned webmaster of kidsafefilms.com was kind enough to e-mail me a very courteous response to my criticisms. Including this:
Jesse I seriously think that’s great. But why even bother Rep. Heath Shuler? You’ve said it yourself: you prefer the airlines to address your concern directly. You’ve brought it to the attention of the public and the airlines. They know. So why involve the government? When that lady who hated the show “Married with Children” wanted action she contacted FOX and the ADVERTISERS directly. I didn’t agree with her opinion, but THAT’S how you handle a problem and get immediate action. She didn’t hound and nag the government, she worked over the sponsors of the show and got results instantly.
Do the same! However I do agree that unfortunately given the dismal state of U.S. airlines I wouldn’t bet on any response soon, so why not vote with your pocketbook? As mentioned it’s EASY to figure out which airlines don’t use general viewed monitors. Southwest, Frontier, jetBlue are all great airlines, and don’t have general viewed monitors. Tell United and Delta you WILL NOT FLY with them because of the potential for kids to see movies. Also I believe they only use these in their 757 and 767 aircraft domestically. And as airlines upgrade their fleets and retire old planes this will be less and less of a (non) issue as personal in-flight entertainment is a highly valued consumer service.
The biggest problem I find with concerned groups like yours, and many others, is that our legislators are being bogged down, (or bogging themselves down,) with petty reactionary NON-problems. You’d find it odd and irritating if you found out that your elected mayor or governor was being forced to order office supplies, clean the coffee pot, and run mundane errands during his shift. You expect more important responsibilities from a person in a position of authority. Just like I want your, or OUR, elected officials to be addressing health care, civic issues, infrastructure, environmental concerns, DIRECT social issues (like school quality,) and REAL consumer affairs. NOT something that the CONSUMER and silently negotiate with a COMPANY through individual commerce.
Thank you for the compliment, but I would dare say the violent movies you speak of are rare and not representative of most airline movies. In fact two recent ones I viewed were the excruciatingly stupid and insufferable films “The Holiday” and “Music and Lyrics.” If I must sit coach through a 10 hour flight to Europe can’t I PLEASE watch something without Hugh Grant, Jennifer Lopez, or Lance Bass in it?
Thanks for the note and all the best… james
I remember a flight to France years back, the film that Air France showed had some pretty explicit sex scenes.
Well guess what – people have sex and are really naked underneath those cloths.
I think Americans make too big a deal of such things.
Thanks for the note. Earlier this year I was relaxing in Munich’s English Gardens. They have an area where people lay out nude. Nearby are paths where others walked by en route to other areas of the park. It’s not close, but the sunbathers are in sight and not hidden.
No one freaked out, no one screamed “PERVERT,” no one even batted an eye. I found the relaxed attitude refreshing and healthy.